Polygamy

Polygamy!  Is it morally acceptable to have 2 wives?

To answer this question, we need to draw a proper distinction between that which is moral & that which is wise. 

Matthew 5:27–28 (ESV): You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

As you can see, in the Sermon on the Mount, adultery is not defined merely by the fact that he or she is not your spouse. Adultery is defined by lustful intent.

What is lust? Lust is, at its root, the failure to love God over & above everything & everyone else & your neighbor before yourself.  Loving yourself more than God & others is definitional to lust, & lust is what underwrites sexual sin - not the mere sex/gender of your target &/or the lack of marriage certificate.   

Using Matt. 5:19 - or any text - to move the moral grounds of moral guilt or innocence away from the motives of a moral agent represents a poor understanding of the Bible relative to how God condemns & commends.  It’s also an exercise in poor hermeneutics relative to how we use Scripture to underwrite Systematic Theology & Christian Ethics. 

What makes any thought, word, or deed worthy of God’s condemnation? The bare act apart from the motive or the motive that underwrites the act? 

1 Samuel 16:7 : 1 Samuel 16:7 (ESV):  For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 

Jeremiah 17:10 (ESV): I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways,  according to the fruit of his deeds.” 

Matthew 5:28 (ESV): 28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 

Answer: The desires that underwrite motives which moved us to act determines what is a sin.  God judges us accordingly.  The bare act is not a sin. If so, then you wind up with God condemning & commending w/o regard to motive, which ultimately means it’s possible to work your way into God’s favor & its possible to fall under His wrath apart from motive. That’s a gospel of works righteousness. 

Matthew 22, Romans 13, & 1 John 4 state that exhaustive, perfect love for God first, then all others & all else, then yourself in that order defined moral righteousness. 

James 1:14 - 15 states that we fall into sin when we follow our own desires into it, resulting in condemnation & death. 

Consequently, morally, polygamy is only immoral if the motives underwriting it do not conform to the above biblical definitions & standards. 

So it’s okay to marry multiple women, right? 

Answer: Just because it’s not necessarily immoral, it doesn’t therefore follow that the Bible teaches it’s a wise thing to do.   In fact, when you think about it, the answer to this question from the perspective of a civil code that regulates behavior, looks a lot like debt bondage, divorce, & slavery.   

The Bible doesn’t outright condemn these social institutions.  Why?  Because it was first delivered to primitive people living in a harsh, often brutal age.  Consequently, the Bible comes across as thoroughly disagreeable today because we live in an age in which the vast bulk of humanity has grown up & we think differently because we are able to provide for each other’s well being in ways that avoid (or ought to avoid) these exploitative, often destructive practices. 

Sure, the Bible regulates how profoundly you can beat a slave, but at the same time, the Bible has a great many strong things to say about assault & battery & the dignity & value of human & animal life. 

The Bible’s civil code regulates all sorts of things, just like modern civil codes regulate all sorts of things.  Motorcycle helmet laws exist, but that does mean we advocate wreckless driving & cycling behaviors.  Likewise the absence of seat belts laws & motorcycle helmet laws & regulations don’t mean you’re not living dangerously if you drive 75 miles an hour in a 65 MPH zone.  

What does polygamy look like in the Bible? 

In Genesis, Abraham’s wife, Sarah, went to war with her servant, Hagar because of Ishmael & Hagar’s concubinage.    Jacob had similar issues in his household.   King Solomon’s reign tanked due to his ever increasing harem.  God separated the North & South, & then used a marriage metaphor in their Judgment.   The language He uses is that of a monogamous husband who realizes that maybe dividing one wife into two wasn’t a great idea, so He decides to put one away for good & keep the other while accepting the offspring of the one put away as His own.  

In the Law, women are treated like property.  Why?  Because these people lived in a harsh time, characterized by social evil’s & upheavals with strong economic components, & their society was deeply, deeply, deeply misogynistic.  

Moreover, women about whom we are speaking weren’t modern day girly girls & womanly women.  Some of the women we meet in the Bible are willing to do what they have to do in order to get by, & if that means driving a railroad spike through Sisera’s temple while he’s asleep after she got him drunk, then “Oh well, the SOB got what was coming to him.”

The Law says things like “If you rape her, you have to marry her,” in order to deter men from rape.   Who in his right mind would want to rape a woman then add her into his household?  That’s inviting strife & maybe even violence into your home.  

Why would not divorce a woman who turns out to be a major league temple prostitute?  Unless there is some prophetic value in not doing so (Hosea) or temple prostitutes are your thing, which might draw the attention of the local morals police anyway, you would be wise to figure out how to be released from this relationship.

Moreover, by the time we get to the New Testament, men are openly encouraged to be one woman men, especially those in positions of leadership.   Not being such a man can blow up in your face, especially in the age of social media.   History is littered with proverbs in which polygamy & harem building did not end well.   

Therefore, even though the Bible allows for polygamy, it doesn’t therefore follow that it’s a wise thing to do.   The Bible allows it just as it allows divorce.  Adam was wed to Eve.  

Marriage has always been covenantal, & divorce is a civil remedy.  Likewise, in a fallen world, a world full of socioeconomic & other injustices, even though the Bible doesn’t explicitly say it, polygamy is, like divorce, a concession to people on account of their hardness of heart.  Instead of seeking to expand polygamy, we ought to in the business of hemming it in & reducing its toxicity, incidence, & prevalence just like we ought to be doing when comes to divorce, debt, debt bondage, human trafficking, slavery, abortion, & other institutions that constantly nip at our heels.  

This is the Way! May we all go & sin no more!